I want to officially document my inventing of the term "Kinetic Valium" which applies to my Fidget Spinner. If you have any kind of anxiety then cast aside your sense of self pride and dignity and get one of these.
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| Note the ink stains. A pen leaked in the same pocket as my fidget spinner. I still wear those pants. |
For me, the fidget spinner helps the most when you're stuck somewhere with absolutely nothing to do or to entertain you. I don't care about the weird looks I get from other adults when I'm playing with a "childrens" toy. I feel like the day I'm considered a "normal" person by other adults is the day that I've failed as a human being.
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| Smoking also alleviates boredom and anxiety but it is not as cool as using a fidget spinner. |
I've recently become a fidget spinning master. I can now spin the device both clockwise and anti-clockwise!! (Well, only in my left hand...I guess after a few more months of practice I'll be able to do it with my right as well but I'll have to quit my job first to make time.)
Fidget spinners can also help with weight loss. Studies show that using a fidget spinner continuously for even as short a time as 17 hours a day can lead to a loss of up to 1 kg of fat per decade! With this kind of intense flow of power one can imagine a clean energy future where fidget spinners are connected directly to the electricity grid to replace fossil fuels, nuclear power and out of date solar generation.
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| When you think about it a wind turbine is just a less efficient and less reliable form of fidget spinner. |
Note : You can also use the term "Kinetic Benzodiazepine" . This avoids any copyright issues.
